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You accidentally drop some food onto the floor and your dog bounds over. You instruct him to back off, but as usual, he ignores you. You’re out on a walk and he sees another dog across the road. You tell him to heel but he instantly tries to leap across the road to sniff the other dog's behind. The truth is, he just doesn’t respect you. If he doesn’t respect you, then training him to do any number of things can be an uphill battle.
Training him not to go to the toilet inside, training him not to jump on the furniture, and loads of other instructions will fall on deaf ears. If you can train him to respect you, however, you will reassert yourself as the pack leader and finally be able to enforce the rules.
Training your dog to respect you isn’t a walk in the park, but it isn’t overly complicated either. The first thing to do is hammer home some obedience commands. These will help show him who is in charge and get him dancing to your tune. You will also need to tackle bad behavior firmly. If he’s a puppy, then getting him to respect you should take just a few weeks, as he should be receptive. If he’s older, it may require a couple of months of reinforcing boundaries before you finally get the respect you deserve.
Get this training right though, and you may see a transformed dog. A dog that sits when you tell him to, goes to the toilet where you want him to, and stays off your furniture when you tell him to. It could also make him more friendly, gentle and sociable around other dogs and people.
Before you can begin seizing back control, you’ll need to gather some things. His favorite food broken into small pieces or tempting treats will be used to motivate and reward him during training.
You’ll also need a quiet place to train for 10 minutes each day. Use a location where you won’t be distracted by noisy children and other pets. For one of the methods, you will also need a spray bottle of water to knock bad behavior on the head.
The only other things you need is a proactive attitude and patience. Then you’re all set to get going!
The Pack Leader Method
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Most Recommended
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Protect him
When you’re on walks, position yourself between other dogs and your own dog. If he’s in front of you then he’ll think he is pack leader and that it’s his job to protect you. If you’re always in-between he’ll respect you keeping him safe.
Comfort him
If he’s afraid of fireworks, thunder, or other dogs, make sure you cheer him up. Just by gently playing with him or giving him the odd treat will perk him up. This is important because he’ll begin to see you in a protector/leader role and he’ll respect you for it.
Always feed him
Dogs respect and remember those that feed them. If you’re always the one to give him his food, he’ll see you as the gateway to calories and want to keep you happy. Also make him wait a couple of minutes for his food, this will further cement your position as the pack leader.
Be firm but never terrifying
Some owners make the mistake of thinking the more they shout the more their dog will respect them. This isn’t the case. In the wild, mothers simply pick pups up by the scruff of their neck and remove them calmly when they’ve misbehaved. You need to have the same calm but firm approach.
Plenty of exercise
If he needs you for his food and exercise he’ll be keen to please you. Give him plenty of walks and he’ll be tired, grateful, and love his adventures with you. All of this will help to position yourself as the pack leader and earn your respect.
The Overall Package Method
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Effective
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Be assertive
You need to be calm but firm when your dog misbehaves. Don’t shout or go off the handle, this may just terrify him. Instead, if he does something wrong, calmly remove him from the situation until he calms down. This will help show him who is pack leader.
Be consistent with boundaries
The saying ‘give him an inch and he’ll take a mile’ can also be applied to dogs, so you have to be consistent. If you let him on the sofa once, he’ll jump on it again. Stick to every rule religiously.
Make him wait
An easy way to demand respect is by making him wait for things. Make him wait a minute before you give him food. Make him wait for a couple of minutes before you take him for a walk. This will all show him you’re the boss and that he has to respect that.
Make him work
Before he gets something nice like a treat or a meal, have him do something to earn it. It could be as simple as getting him to sit or lie down. This will help him to focus on pleasing you and trying to win your affection for tasty rewards.
Give him his own space
Ensure he has a bed or corner of a room that’s all his. Let that be only his, don’t always go in there to play with him. This will soon become his own territory. By having his own territory that’s all his, he’ll begin to realize everywhere else in the house is your territory and that you’re the leader of it.
The Obedience Commands Method
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‘Sit’
Hold a treat out in front of him and give him the ‘sit’ command. By teaching him obedience commands you are reinforcing your control and showing him that you control the tasty rewards.
Encouragement
If he doesn’t get the hang of it straight away, lead his nose up with the treat or push his bottom down gently with your hand. As soon as he’s seated, give him a treat and lots of praise. Practice this each day until he’s a sit down pro.
Incorporate other obedience commands
You could teach him to lie down, to roll over, even to do a back flip. Daily training like this will be fantastic for teaching him to respect you. It will change the way he perceives you and for the better!
Water spray bottle
If he misbehaves, you can quickly give him a spray of water near his face. Don’t spray it into his eyes, just a short burst to let him know that was the wrong behavior. He will learn to respect you, otherwise you can cause this unpleasant experience.
Encourage down time
Spending a few minutes each day quietly in each others company is important for building a healthy, respectful relationship. Don’t play with each other or be noisy, just have him lie next to you. This will help build a comfortable bond and that will in turn lead to him respecting you.
Written by James Barra
Veterinary reviewed by:
Published: 10/18/2017, edited: 01/08/2021
Training Questions and Answers
My doggo has hit the age where the hormones are running wild! He has recently started showing various behavior issues such as ignorance, over excitement & bullying/dominating other dogs (not knowing when enough play is enough). Due to his size I really want to nip these issues in the bud before they spiral out of control. He is currently on a food elimination diet to try & rectify his gut health issues so training him has been super difficult as he does not respond to his current food for treats he just ignored me when distracted by something of a higher value. What would you suggest that I can do to rectify these issues?
July 10, 2022
Koda's Owner
Caitlin Crittenden - Dog Trainer
1128 Dog owners recommended
Hello Lauren, Check out this trainer's video channel and his intermediate obedience and off-leash obedience training videos. Notice the search feature on the video channel where you can look up resources on specific training topics. I would pursue intermediate and advanced training resources to help you learn how to teach obedience in high distraction situations, how to proof knows commands so pup is reliable even when they don't want to obey, and how to use life rewards to get pup to work for you throughout the day to earn what they want by obeying a command first - so pup is practicing training without even needing treats most of the time. https://www.youtube.com/c/JamiePenrithDogTraining/featured Out - which means move away: https://www.petful.com/behaviors/how-to-teach-a-dog-the-out-command/ Come - check out the premack principle section. Since pup is so big, for safety reasons I would do this in a fenced area in case you have to drop the leash, and play the leash in and out to avoid too much excess slack in the leash - which would allow pup to pick up speed then hit then end of it. Pup's size is a large reason why I recommend training more closely related to James Penrith's methods, which could allow you to train in a way that's less dependent on a leash and more off-leash, since a leash doesn't always stop a dog who can outweigh the person - pup's obedience skills need to be able to stop them. Best of luck training, Caitlin Crittenden
July 11, 2022
Hi when my dog was younger I would let him get away with things and now it has gotten worse over time and he doesnt want to obey me when i ask him down or certain commands and he will cry if i dont give him the food he likes like i did before how can i stop this?
July 4, 2022
teddy's Owner
Caitlin Crittenden - Dog Trainer
1128 Dog owners recommended
Hello Sam, Check out the article I have linked below. I recommend following all three methods for a while right now. https://wagwalking.com/training/train-a-doberman-to-listen-to-you Expect this to take a little time at first, and pup may protest more the first couple of weeks when you implement new changes and follow through on rules. Be firm and consistent in your communication, follow through and rules but physically gentle - I would keep a drag leash on pup while you are home so that you can calmly direct pup with that as needed - like if you tell pup Out, Leave It, or Come, you can simply pick up the end of the leash if pup is ignoring you, and lead pup where they need to go so you are following through, without having to chase pup down, grad them, or corner them. Take the leash off when you aren't home, when pup is crated, and at night, to avoid the risk of it becoming entangled on something. Best of luck training, Caitlin Crittenden
July 4, 2022
my dog is hard headed she wont listen when you tell her to do something.she keeps biting and pulling on people pants what should i do
June 22, 2022
lady's Owner
Caitlin Crittenden - Dog Trainer
1128 Dog owners recommended
Hello Rebecca, Check out the article linked below. Starting today, use the "Bite Inhibition" method. BUT at the same time, begin teaching "Leave It" from the "Leave It" method. As soon as pup is good as the Leave It game, start telling pup to "Leave It" when she attempts to bite or is tempted to bite. Reward pup if she makes a good choice. If she disobeys your leave it command, use the Out command from the second article linked below to make her leave the area as a consequence. The order or all of this is very important - the Bite Inhibition method can be used for the next couple of weeks while pup is learning leave it, but leave it will teach pup to stop the biting entirely. The Out method teaches pup that you mean what you say without being overly harsh - but because you have taught pup to leave it first, pup clearly understands that you are not just playing (which is what pup probably thinks most of the time right now), so it is more effective. https://wagwalking.com/training/train-a-shih-tzu-puppy-to-not-bite Out - which means leave the area, is also a good command for you to use if pup bites the kids. Check out the section on Using Out to Deal with Pushy Behavior for how to calmly enforce that command once it's taught. https://www.petful.com/behaviors/how-to-teach-a-dog-the-out-command/ Another important part of this is puppy learning bite inhibition. Puppies have to learn while young how to control the pressure of their mouths - this is typically done through play with other puppies. See if there is a puppy class in your area that comes well recommended and has time for moderated off-leash puppy play. If you can't join a class, look for a free puppy play group, or recruit some friends with puppies to come over if you can and create your own group. You are looking for puppies under 6 months of age - since young puppies play differently than adult dogs. Right now, an outside class may be best in a fenced area, or letting friends' pups play in someone's fence outside. Moderate the puppies' play and whenever one pup seems overwhelmed or they are all getting too excited, interrupt their play, let everyone calm down, then let the most timid pup go first to see if they still want to play - if they do, then you can let the other puppies go too when they are waiting for permission. Finding a good puppy class - no class will be ideal but here's what to shoot for: https://www.petful.com/behaviors/puppy-classes-when-to-start/ When pup gets especially wound up, she probably needs a nap too. At this age puppies will sometimes get really hyper when they are overtired or haven't had any mental stimulation through something like training. When you spot that and think pup could be tired, place pup in their crate or an exercise pen with a food stuffed Kong for a bit to help her calm down and rest. Practicing regular obedience commands or having pup earn what they get by performing commands like Sit and Down before feeding, petting, tossing a toy, opening the door for a walk, ect... can also help stimulate pup mentally to increase calmness and wear them out. Commands that practice focus, self-control, and learning something a bit new or harder than before can all tire out puppies. Finally, check out the PDF e-book downloads found on this website, written by one of the founders of the association of professional dog trainers, and a pioneer in starting puppy kindergarten classes in the USA. Click on the pictures of the puppies to download the PDF books: https://www.lifedogtraining.com/freedownloads/ Know that mouthiness at this age is completely normal. It's not fun but it is normal for it to take some time for a puppy to learn self-control well enough to stop. Try not to get discouraged if you don't see instant progress, any progress and moving in the right direction in this area is good, so keep working at it. Best of luck training, Caitlin Crittenden
June 22, 2022